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Leave Me Alone

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I Can’t Believe I’m Actually Going Through With This


MarriedtoMikeDirnt

847 views

Why’d I let y’all talk me into this? We’ll never know. I’ll just say you twisted my arm. 

 

To the people that wanted to see this, @Hungry Hungry Supermodels @BillieMyLove, prepare for disappointment. 

 

Disclaimer: pretty explicit, raunchy, very weird

Spoiler

 

(To the tune of Pop Goes The Weasel)

Poke around the pubic hair bush 

To find the sacred treasure 

Hanging low and wrinkly, too (eww, wrinkly balls)

Touch it for his pleasure 

Swallow your pride and give ‘em a suck

Careful with the teeth, hon

Squeeze his twins and then he pops

Loose testicle on the run

 

 

Alright, that’s one that I just came up with. (I wanna go teach that to a bunch of little kids whenever I get done typing this stuff; that is hilarious). Here’s the original. It’s terrible.

Spoiler

 

(You have to rap this one, but like, make it Beastie Boys/RATM. No reason, just do it). 

Swing low, sweet ball sack 

With every little thrust comes a great big smack

Lay me down and teabag me

I can never get enough of your balls, baby (🤦🏽‍♀️much prayer needed for that rhyme)

They weigh a ton and they’ve got delay

They never make contact cause it takes all day

When I see those balls coming my way

I see them bounce back like an instant replay.

(Oh my god, I’m ending this here.)

 

 

I’m going to hell for this 😑.

  • Haha 2

7 Comments


Recommended Comments

MarriedtoMikeDirnt

Posted

2 minutes ago, BillieMyLove said:

I don't know how to feel about this LOL.

Neither do I, lol.

It’s the worst thing I’ve ever created. (Except, I’m very proud of the first one).

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Lady Mix-A-Lot

Posted

I must say I do prefer the first one. It just seemed to make more sense I guess LOL. But as satire, this one works too. :) 

I meant I liked the dick song better. I didn't realize these were two separate ones at first LOL. In this case, I guess the second ball song makes more sense than the first LOL. The second sounds like some kind of unrequited ball love LOL.

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Hungry Hungry Supermodels

Posted

The first one has the perfect amount of dark humour. I was not expecting that ending.

Why do I feel like the second one has a story behind it? 

 

Link to comment
MarriedtoMikeDirnt

Posted

4 minutes ago, Hungry Hungry Supermodels said:

The first one has the perfect amount of dark humour. I was not expecting that ending.

Why do I feel like the second one has a story behind it? 

Because it does.

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Hungry Hungry Supermodels

Posted

1 minute ago, MarriedtoMikeDirnt said:

Because it does.

Spill.

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