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Beerjeezus

I agree it makes no sense to demand stricter treatment for someone - that wouldn't be fair at all. And to give credit where credit is due, the situation seems to be handled in a standard way, which is a good sign that claiming to be an insider doesn't automatically mean a 100% imunity. So this probably should increase trust for the team rather than the opposite (which seems to be the case).

However, it's naïve to expect people won't get worked up when they're being baited. Not replying works fine for many of us, including me, but you can't expect that no one will say anything.

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Joe.
1 hour ago, Jane Lannister said:

I agree it makes no sense to demand stricter treatment for someone - that wouldn't be fair at all. And to give credit where credit is due, the situation seems to be handled in a standard way, which is a good sign that claiming to be an insider doesn't automatically mean a 100% imunity. So this probably should increase trust for the team rather than the opposite (which seems to be the case).

However, it's naïve to expect people won't get worked up when they're being baited. Not replying works fine for many of us, including me, but you can't expect that no one will say anything.

Yeah if this is the standard way, then its the standard way. All I've tried to put across is that it's probably not effective and in my experience there are better ways to deal with it. Guess its short term v long term problems.

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Daddy.

I probably did overreact and there have been good arguments on either side.

I'll just go and watch porn next time then.

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Beerjeezus
14 minutes ago, Joe. said:

Yeah if this is the standard way, then its the standard way. All I've tried to put across is that it's probably not effective and in my experience there are better ways to deal with it. Guess its short term v long term problems.

Yeah, it isn't effective. And I agree with the point you're making. What I meant is that the forum is already pretty heavily moderated and the last thing that would improve it is creating an even more controlling environment, but I think that's the same thing you've said.

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The Insider

I have'nt read the posts & I was away for the actual event - but I have some history with a certain poster both on the boards & via PM - I nearly didn't come back - but I decided to actually not read anything the poster said & make everything pretty light hearted because really I don't give a shit - I just like going to GD concerts & love their music.

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Adorkable
18 minutes ago, The Insider said:

I have'nt read the posts & I was away for the actual event - but I have some history with a certain poster both on the boards & via PM - I nearly didn't come back - but I decided to actually not read anything the poster said & make everything pretty light hearted because really I don't give a shit - I just like going to GD concerts & love their music.

My experience was exactly the same, as you are aware. 

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The Insider
36 minutes ago, Adorkable said:

My experience was exactly the same, as you are aware. 

It was your advice that sees me back making quality posts🤡

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Joe.
9 minutes ago, The Insider said:

It was your advice that sees me back making quality posts🤡

Something I’ll try and do :bunny:

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maryjanewhatsername

Hey @Hermione I need help again.. I saw how titles that everyone has are different. Like when I started it said "Welcome to Paradise" and now it's "Chump" and other people's seem customized. Is there a way to customize it? 

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AlissaGoesRAWR
21 minutes ago, maryjanewhatsername said:

Hey @Hermione I need help again.. I saw how titles that everyone has are different. Like when I started it said "Welcome to Paradise" and now it's "Chump" and other people's seem customized. Is there a way to customize it? 

You can create a custom title once you hit 3,000 posts. Until then, it'll change as you hit certain post milestones.

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Fuzz
6 hours ago, Joe. said:

Yeah if this is the standard way, then its the standard way. All I've tried to put across is that it's probably not effective and in my experience there are better ways to deal with it. Guess its short term v long term problems.

Again, what are those better ways? I'm interested in how you guys would handle these situations if you weren't involved in them.

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maryjanewhatsername
2 hours ago, AlissaGoesRAWR said:

You can create a custom title once you hit 3,000 posts. Until then, it'll change as you hit certain post milestones.

Thank you!! 

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AlissaGoesRAWR
1 hour ago, maryjanewhatsername said:

Thank you!! 

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Joe.
5 hours ago, Fuzz said:

Again, what are those better ways? I'm interested in how you guys would handle these situations if you weren't involved in them.

Well as I’ve said a couple times that Facebook page is kinda self modded and with around 10,000 active members there’s very rarely an issue. How I’ve seen it go down is if someone’s been a dick (for example a guy hijacked a post by complaining about teenage behaviour at Idles gigs, which is of course a ridiculous generalisation) people politely call them out for it. In the instance I’ve mentioned instead of just tagging a mod (because as you’ve stated mean people being mean isn’t the rules being broken) a discussion took place. Is it really just one group of people that act like idiots at gigs? No. In the short term it took the discussion further off topic. In the long term it changed someone’s outlook, stopping more passive aggressive posts from them as their views have changed.

Of course there are differences. I’m not saying the general opinion is always going to be right. If we stick with my example maybe it is just us pesky kids ruining kids and everyone over 40 is a saint, but by discussing opinions and behaviour that many see as rude/condescending/WoahWhereDidThatComeFrom you will almost always stop any problems escalating. Each side can understand one another and the discussion is unlikely to repeat. Just sticking your head in the sand and reporting a post isn’t a long term fix, or if it is it’s an incredibly long term fix because it’s been at least 18 months since I’ve had my first interaction and said user is still acting the same way. As others have said in this thread it’s nearly stopped them coming on here at all, and it stopped me for a while.

I guess the other main difference is that Facebook is considerably less anonymous than here which may help people think before they type, but in my opinion it’s the way that the community has been developed to be a positive, all is love, type thing. That’s the harder thing to grow and maybe that’s just too snowflakey a thing to even try and introduce, but i welcome you to go on there and it’s a beautiful outpouring of affection for an incredible punk band as well as people sharing personal issues.

Ive read people getting help from other users for grief, addiction, even helping find a missing person. And that’s in a group where your personal info is much more accessible, so something must be going on to make people that comfortable?

I want to make it clear that GDC shouldn’t be a support group or anything, the page I mentioned isn’t, my point is that if an atmosphere that positive can be fostered without warning points galore then surely there’s an alternative way to run things? If you or any mods PM me I can add you myself to have a look around :) 

Anyway. I accept the way things work on here and if mods are happy then fair enough, it’s not my forum. I think the point we’ve all tried to make is that maybe short term losses in terms of off topic might bring about some long term gains. That being said I’m now pretty done with this situation. There’s a difference in opinon between the mods and others, I’ve accepted that. Just got to have a wank or whatever the advice is whenever certain users appear on my screen 

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AlissaGoesRAWR
3 hours ago, Joe. said:

Well as I’ve said a couple times that Facebook page is kinda self modded and with around 10,000 active members there’s very rarely an issue. How I’ve seen it go down is if someone’s been a dick (for example a guy hijacked a post by complaining about teenage behaviour at Idles gigs, which is of course a ridiculous generalisation) people politely call them out for it. In the instance I’ve mentioned instead of just tagging a mod (because as you’ve stated mean people being mean isn’t the rules being broken) a discussion took place. Is it really just one group of people that act like idiots at gigs? No. In the short term it took the discussion further off topic. In the long term it changed someone’s outlook, stopping more passive aggressive posts from them as their views have changed.

So why is this conversation needed in a thread instead of a private message? 

And what happens in your Facebook group if someone just doesn’t come around at all to seeing your point of view? You’ve said already that you’ve talked to a user you’ve had an issue with on here twice and “nothing’s changed.” So it seems like you’ve used your own method of moderating and it’s not working. What would you do if you were in charge here then? Get rid of them for disagreeing? Again, as annoying as someone might be, or as much as they may disagree with your viewpoints, you can’t just arbitrarily get rid of people you don’t like, which is why we have guidelines here to try to make it as fair as possible for everyone. And nobody’s explicitly said how they want this apparent issue to ”dealt with” so I can only assume that’s the solution you want? 

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Joe.
2 minutes ago, AlissaGoesRAWR said:

So why is this conversation needed in a thread instead of a private message? 

because I'm replying to someone thats spoken to me... in this thread?

And what happens in your Facebook group if someone just doesn’t come around at all to seeing your point of view? You’ve said already that you’ve talked to a user you’ve had an issue with on here twice and “nothing’s changed.” So it seems like you’ve used your own method of moderating and it’s not working. What would you do if you were in charge here then? Get rid of them for disagreeing? Again, as annoying as someone might be, or as much as they may disagree with your viewpoints, you can’t just arbitrarily get rid of people you don’t like, which is why we have guidelines here to try to make it as fair as possible for everyone. And nobody’s explicitly said how they want this apparent issue to ”dealt with” so I can only assume that’s the solution you want? 

I've done what I've been told to and it's not worked, my point is that a group discussion tends to be the way to go. That was shut down as it goes against the rules, which is fine. People quite rightly don't get kicked out for having a difference in opinion, this whole discussion is about the way users conduct themselves and when a group of people are politely telling you to stop being a dick, most would think about that. It's irrelevant though really, the way things are dealt with won't change and thats completely fine, all I've done is say there are alternatives.

Me and mods clearly disagree on this so I'm happy to leave the discussion here as theres no point saying the same things to each other, I just think theres something not right if the behaviour of one user is putting off others from posting. It's put me off and one other has said the same, although I'm not trying to speak for others so won't get them involved. I don't have an easy answer for you as I've stated several times, just shown what is effective in other places.

 

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AlissaGoesRAWR
3 hours ago, Joe. said:

 

I didn't know this was unclear — I meant why would the type of "self-moderated" group discussion that takes place in your Facebook group need to happen publicly? That could easily just happen in a private message on here if you think it'll work and certainly isn't against the rules.

Generally, on here, the public, "let's call out someone" mob mentality just results in folks becoming defensive and a thread spiraling off-topic, no matter how "politely" you think you're call them out. Plus, you say this behavior that works in your Facebook group would work here if we allowed it, but likewise you also say you've tried it here and it hasn't worked, so I really just don't understand what you want.

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Joe.
5 hours ago, AlissaGoesRAWR said:

I didn't know this was unclear — I meant why would the type of "self-moderated" group discussion that takes place in your Facebook group need to happen publicly? That could easily just happen in a private message on here if you think it'll work and certainly isn't against the rules.

Generally, on here, the public, "let's call out someone" mob mentality just results in folks becoming defensive and a thread spiraling off-topic, no matter how "politely" you think you're call them out. Plus, you say this behavior that works in your Facebook group would work here if we allowed it, but likewise you also say you've tried it here and it hasn't worked, so I really just don't understand what you want.

I’ve joined a group calling someone else out once and got banned. That was me trying it.

i genuinely have no idea how to set up a group PM otherwise that’d be something to consider

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AlissaGoesRAWR
18 hours ago, Joe. said:

I’ve joined a group calling someone else out once and got banned. That was me trying it.

i genuinely have no idea how to set up a group PM otherwise that’d be something to consider

Under messages, when you click "compose new," you can type as many usernames as you want into the "to" section. Then it gets sent to all of them at the same time and anyone can chime in like a group chat.

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