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Boyfriend demanding sex even though relationship is bad


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35 replies to this topic

#1
Remy

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My relationship is not going well lately (at all), I feel really underappreciated and not treated good. And he knows I feel this way, yet he expects me to have sex with him. He sometimes insults me just cause he is in a bad mood and then later, when he is horny, tries to cover up the previous insults by being in a jokey mood and basically grabbing me on my ass and asking me what's the matter when I say I don't want that. I don't feel like I have a responsibility to have sex with him just because we haven't broken up yet. Maybe this is TMI but the other day when he visited, we argued and then after that I was doing some dishes in the kitchen and he comes from behind and puts his hand inside my jeans and panties (between my legs). I told him to fucking stop and moved away, but isn't it technically considered rape if you finger someone who isn't agreeing to it?



#2
Céadóg

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Sorry, to hear about your relationship troubles, but there is a thread for relationships already :)

 

http://www.greendayc...-relationships/



#3
Sam Smith

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Well I'm not a law student. nor am i fully aware of what counts as Rape. but, if he did that and you didn't want it, it can be deemed as; Sexual assault. i recommend  you get out of that situation. 

also, i think this should be in the Help and Advice section instead of General chat..



Sorry, to hear about your relationship troubles, but there is a thread for relationships already :)

 

http://www.greendayc...-relationships/

what he said



#4
Remy

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I don't have access to that forum.



#5
Céadóg

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I don't have access to that forum.

 

That's your issue. A mod will close this, because it really doesn't belong in General Chat.



#6
Remy

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That's your issue.

 

And it's certainly isn't yours, so get off your high horse please. You don't know the issue at hand.


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#7
Kaddi.

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:blink:



#8
Remy

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WTF. can you guys stop destroying my topic.

 

Someone please delete this. It's ruined now.



#9
.Holly

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And you haven't dumped him because...

#10
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I'd just quit the relationship, tbh.

You posted several times about it and it doesn't seem that it makes you happy at all, so it's not worth it, imho. 



#11
Remy

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And you haven't dumped him because...

 

Because loving someone is a complicated thing.


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#12
Billie Hoe is my hero

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puts his hand inside my jeans and panties (between my legs). I told him to fucking stop and moved away, but isn't it technically considered rape if you finger someone who isn't agreeing to it?

I'm pretty sure it is.

 

Norwegian stuff:

En definisjon på voldtekt er: gjerningspersonen invaderer kroppen til en annen person med et kjønnsorgan, en gjenstand eller noen annen del av kroppen på en måte som resulterer i penetrering av genital eller anal kroppsåpning hos offeret. Dette blir sett på som voldtekt når den blir begått med makt, ved trussel om vold eller tvang, for eksempel som følge av frykt for vold, tvang eller frihetsberøvelse, ved psykisk undertrykkelse eller ved å utnytte et tvangspreget miljø.

 

I'm so sorry that you had to experience that, and that your boyfriend is treating you this way.


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#13
Malleus

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You shouldn't start a ridiculous thread and then bitch at people who calmly point out why this doesn't need to be a thread.

 

Also you are 21 years old, you should have a bit more sense in regards to relationships. Are you seriously debating the issue of owing somebody sex to yourself? I mean you obviously know that's fucking silly, so why even think about it? Yeah loving someone is "complicated" but you made a thread asking for opinions on when it's cool to cheat. You are not in love. Move on, and tell us all about it in an already existing thread. :lol:


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#14
Céadóg

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And it's certainly isn't yours, so get off your high horse please. You don't know the issue at hand.

I'm not on any high horse, there's no need to be aggressive. I just said that getting banned from those forums was your issue. I'm not here to start any shit, I was just telling you what will happen. And now I'm done. Bye.
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#15
Kaddi.

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Because loving someone is a complicated thing.

 

It is, but you're obviously not happy in your current relationship, so staying with him although he makes you feel miserable is no solution.



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#16
Remy

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I'm pretty sure it is.

 

Norwegian stuff:

En definisjon på voldtekt er: gjerningspersonen invaderer kroppen til en annen person med et kjønnsorgan, en gjenstand eller noen annen del av kroppen på en måte som resulterer i penetrering av genital eller anal kroppsåpning hos offeret. Dette blir sett på som voldtekt når den blir begått med makt, ved trussel om vold eller tvang, for eksempel som følge av frykt for vold, tvang eller frihetsberøvelse, ved psykisk undertrykkelse eller ved å utnytte et tvangspreget miljø.

 

I'm so sorry that you had to experience that, and that your boyfriend is treating you this way.

 

Thank you. And that definition makes sense.

 

You shouldn't start a ridiculous thread and then bitch at people who calmly point out why this doesn't need to be a thread.

 

Also you are 21 years old, you should have a bit more sense in regards to relationships. Are you seriously debating the issue of owing somebody sex to yourself? I mean you obviously know that's fucking silly, so why even think about it? Yeah loving someone is "complicated" but you made a thread asking for opinions on when it's cool to cheat. You are not in love. Move on, and tell us all about it in an already existing thread. :lol:

 

Reported to admin.



 getting banned from those forums

 

You're way off. I will have access soon. You don't know what you are talking about.


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#17
Kaddi.

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Thank you. And that definition makes sense.

 

 

Reported to admin.

 

Please stop reporting everything to an admin, seriously. Especially if nobody did anything wrong except tell the truth.


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#18
Remy

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Please stop reporting everything to an admin, seriously. Especially if nobody did anything wrong except tell the truth.

 

Get out of my topic, troll. What's your problem with me? This is a serious topic and you're trying to destroy it. What's the matter with you



#19
Kaddi.

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Get out of my topic, troll. What's your problem with me? This is a serious topic and you're trying to destroy it. What's the matter with you

 

If you take a close look, you'll see that I tried to give you advice a few posts back. Nobody here is trying to "destroy your topic", okay? And if you make a thread open for everyone, you shouldn't complain when people post in it, even if you might not like them.


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#20
Remy

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If you take a close look, you'll see that I tried to give you advice a few posts back. Nobody here is trying to "destroy your topic", okay? And if you make a thread open for everyone, you shouldn't complain when people post in it, even if you might not like them.

 

Do you think you could find something else to do? Please? I'd appreciate it. This is a personal issue and I have no where else to ask advice. Leave me alone.



#21
Billie Hoe is my hero

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Thank you. And that definition makes sense.

 

Sure. Yeah, I'm pretty sure it's correct.

Off course love is complicated, but when you're with a person that treats you like this, it will only bring you down. Since you're staying with him, he thinks that it's okay since he gets away with it.

I was in a bad relationship when I was 14, with a guy that beat me up all the time. Then and there, I always made excuses for him, he was nice sometimes and so on. But today, I would never except something like that ever.

When he treats you like that, doesn't it make you question how he feels about you? If he can do such things to you?



#22
Sam Smith

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This is clearly a sensitive subject. what we are doing is giving you a watered down version of what the Mods will most likely say and do. So reporting us. is going to have NO effect whatsoever.

in the mean time. Get rid of him. move on, we've all been down  heartbreak street, so don't attack the locals



#23
Remy

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This is clearly a sensitive subject. what we are doing is giving you a watered down version of what the Mods will most likely say and do. So reporting us. is going to have NO effect whatsoever.

in the mean time. Get rid of him. move on, we've all been down  heartbreak street, so don't attack the locals

 

I'm not attacking anyone :( I'm the one being bullied by you guys, and I haven't done anything! I made a very personal and sensitive topic and I'm being bullied, do you have any idea how that feels? It cuts like a knife. So right now I want this topic closed more than anyone. I wish I never made it. I wish I had access to the Relationships thread, but I don't, so I will deal with this issue on my fucking own.

 

Billie Hoe is my Hero, so sorry you had to go through all that. Yes, it really makes you question those things.


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#24
Billie Hoe is my hero

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Billie Hoe is my Hero, so sorry you had to go through all that. Yes, it really makes you question those things.

 

Thanks. It's okay, it's several years ago. :) It's up to you what you end up doing with the relationship, but it doesn't seem healthy at all.



#25
Sam Smith

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I'm not attacking anyone :( I'm the one being bullied by you guys, and I haven't done anything! I made a very personal and sensitive topic and I'm being bullied, do you have any idea how that feels? It cuts like a knife. So right now I want this topic closed more than anyone. I wish I never made it. I wish I had access to the Relationships thread, but I don't, so I will deal with this issue on my fucking own.

 

Billie Hoe is my Hero, so sorry you had to go through all that. Yes, it really makes you question those things.

its a figure of speech, but no worry's. 

okay guys. don't reply or say anything in this thread so an Admin or Mod can lock it up, but please note we were not trying to bully you in anyway. just giving our advice, if you felt bullied by this, we apologize, I apologize

Lock it up, Mod's 



#26
Céadóg

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You're way off. I will have access soon. You don't know what you are talking about.

 

Just to clarify, once you've got a 24 hour suspension, you won't be able to post in the advice threads for a month. Considering I just finished that period last night, I rather do think I know what I'm talking about ;)

 

Okay bye again.



#27
Remy

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its a figure of speech, but no worry's. 

okay guys. don't reply or say anything in this thread so an Admin or Mod can lock it up, but please note we were not trying to bully you in anyway. just giving our advice, if you felt bullied by this, we apologize, I apologize

Lock it up, Mod's 

 

Yes I did feel that way. I'm just waiting for a mod friend of mine to get online so he can decide what to do. In the meantime, leave this topic the fuck alone, you all have done nothing but make me feel sadder about the whole subject.

 

Just to clarify, once you've got a 24 hour suspension, you won't be able to post in the advice threads for a month. Considering I just finished that period last night, I rather do think I know what I'm talking about ;)

 

Okay bye again.

 

Wtf?



#28
NoVaCaInE!

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You should finish your relationship. You're clearly not happy in it going by the threads over the last few days.

#29
johndorkian

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he sexually assaulted you. dump him.

#30
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From your posts, I get the feeling that you're either looking for a place to vent, or at least one of us to tell you to stick it out with this man, because love is more important than cheating, bad treatment, or borderline sexual harassment (I don't think it's that harsh which is why I said borderline, he is her boyfriend after all). The thing is, and no offence here, your boyfriend sounds like a complete dick who has a hell of a lot of growing up to do. He treats you badly, he uses you for sex, and you're basically looking for a way to hurt him in the same way he hurt you. That's wrong. The best thing to do is to follow the sound advice from everyone you has given you it (and I mean the genuine advice, not the arguments) and break up with him. 

 

But, that said, I have a feeling you'll make another topic later this week with something else that he's done, and asking us what to do from now on. =/ Can I ask, without being rude, what do you think you should do? You're not following our advice, which is leading me to think that you've got something else in mind. 


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