Planet Fitness was nothing but great to me.
They have a "lunk alarm" which sounds if they hear or see anyone being ridiculous. However, it's up to the workers to decide on that. If you're excessively grunting and screaming, yeah, it's gonna sound. If you're slamming weights just to be a douche, it's gonna go off. If you're deadlifting, it won't go off. At least it never did in my experience. It actually never once went off while I was there.
PF got me back into lifting after BG and I took off from there. Tons of spot training machines. It's cardio bunny heaven. They also have a PF 20-minute workout room for those in a hurry. It's like a dumbed-down version of Insanity with a few machines.
Downside: they serve pizza every Tuesday. It's stupid. They give you tootsie rolls and pop, as well. And not a ton of free weights. Seriously, I doubt their free weights add up to a ton total.
Upside: the crowd is the opposite of intimidating. They don't judge you. (Not that I've felt judgement other places, but whatevs.) It's clean. You can watch TV while running. Much like at Urban Active when I would watch sex scenes with peeps in the cardio movie room and we all had a good time.
They have these things called Smiths Machines. It's essentially a squat, bench, deadlifting and overhead press rack, but it's completely controlled and stationary. If you start to fail, roll your wrist and the bar inserts into a peg. Kinda nice, but doesn't help with the surrounding muscle game.
The stereotype is that it's a gym for fat and lazy people to go to and feel like they're doing something, despite sitting around, eating pizza and watching TV. Which, I did see. But then you have people, like myself, who ain't there to fukk around for an hour so I can tell my nagging wife that I'm working on my heart condition despite taking up a machine and continuing to add more pressure on to the Earth in the form of amorphis blob. Take Urban Active, minus the huge dudes, free weights, ropes, bondage equipment, tires and grunting, but add a bunch of people who won't spot you, won't judge you, won't motivate you, but will eat your pizza and watch in envy as you still have the thin privilege of moving.
It's essentially the "Average Joes" gym from Dodgeball or whatever. If you get the VIP or "Black" membership, you get to have a partner in free, use the tanning beds (sheiiit, you're translucent - I can literally see through you) and massage beds. Bad thing 'bout the massage beds: you're kinda on display as people walk by. They can look in and watch ya get all squishy.
But shit, it's like $10 to sign up and $10 a month. Gopher it.