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My Rage My Love My Life

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Stray Heart

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The first time I ever heard a crappy live recording of this song, just half of it from the Tiki Bar, I knew it was going to be one of my favourites (or even favourite, non-plural, actually). When an even worse quality recording of the full thing surfaced from the Austin show, I loved it even more. I hurt my ears playing that awful recording over and over. I could have got sick of it... but somehow I'm not. Even though I've apparently played the studio version 204 times already.

That's enough fangirling about how much I love it. A lot of people see this song as an apology, or being about cheating, but I've never really felt that. To me - and I'm in no way implying anything about Billie, this is just me and my personal analysis - it's simply about having a stray heart. It's about being in love with someone you're not supposed to be in love with. "I just can't have you" yet "we'll never part" is a contradiction, but to me that translates to "I'm not supposed to have you" or, in simpler terms, "I can't have you because I already belong to sombody else". The heart which is now stray went to another a long time ago, but you're dreaming of the person you can't have... without a home, because your heart's strayed from the home you have.

The upbeat tempo and awesome bassline masks a sort of sadness somewhere in the lyrics, the desperation that goes with needing someone and needing them to accept you; but a lovestruck happiness is mixed in at the same time. It's beautiful, it's open, it's not trying to hide anything. And I can relate to it so damn much, even if that's not what Billie had in mind when he wrote it.

Yeah, I can go on about one song for that long. Sorry if you were expecting something more exciting. I just wanted to write something about this beautiful song, and what it means to me.

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