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Tay Writes Sometimes

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#20 An Ode To A Magikarp. And Other Songs.

It's Splash Time

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Yeah. That's right. I'm moving my shit over.

An Ode To A Magikarp

Worthless, hopeless, pathetic

You’ve heard them all

Just sit and let the currents of life push you along

They laugh because you’re weak

They don’t know

Remember that in every fail there is an A

You don’t need to change

To be the best

Come on

Keep heart against the rage

One day you’ll see

Not everything that flails

Is devoid of love

Keep going

Through everything

The fire of your skin can’t keep you back

Remember that in every fail there is an A

You don’t need to change

To be the best

Happiness

When we know our place

On through the unknown

To the place where you belong

Together

Together in the scattered light

They don’t know

Remember that in every fail there is an A

You don’t need to change

To be the best

My first original song/poem/thing that I actually like. Wooo.

(This is backwards chronological order btw)

Transition Metal Complexes (parodying the original Pokemon theme)

I wanna be coloured

Like the complementary colour

To one that is absorbed

To excite my electron to a d orbital

I will split my orbitals

Crystal field splitting

Teach Transition Metal to understand

The power from ligands

Transition Metal! (Gotta Colour 'em)

It's five d orbitals

I know it's incomplete

Transition Metal!

Ooh, you're my complex

In an electrostatic field

Transition Metal! (Gotta Colour 'em)

Our absorbed radiation

From the visible part of the spectrum

You help me and I'll help you

Transition Metal

Gotta colour 'em, gotta colour 'em all!

Gotta colour 'em all!

Every analysis along the way

With colorimeter I will face

I will have absorbance

Directly proportional to concentration

Different ligands, different colours

Crystal field splittings

In order of how well they can split d orbitals

It's always been our dream

Transition Metal! (Gotta Colour 'em)

It's five d orbitals

I know it's incomplete

Transition Metal!

Ooh, you're my complex

In an electrostatic field

Transition Metal! (Gotta Colour 'em)

Our absorbed radiation

From the visible part of the spectrum

You help me and I'll help you

Transition Metal

Gotta colour 'em, gotta colour 'em all!

Gotta colour 'em all!

Transition Metal! (Gotta Colour 'em)

It's five d orbitals

I know it's incomplete

Transition Metal!

Ooh, you're my complex

In an electrostatic field

Transition Metal! (Gotta Colour 'em)

Our absorbed radiation

From the visible part of the spectrum

You help me and I'll help you

Transition Metal

Gotta colour 'em, gotta colour 'em all!

Gotta colour 'em all!

Alkanes and Alkenes (parodying Stuart and the Ave.)

Standing on the worktop

Alkanes and alkenes

Working up my courage

For the hydrocarbons of you

You're a mix of carbon and hydrogen

And I try to figure out the difference between you

Well, bromine is best

In the alkenes now

Before it might have been coloured

But now it's colourless

Formulas change as well as properties

And alkenes are 2n hydrogens

Your isomer is a cycloalkane

Starting only from cyclopropane

The isomer and the same general formula

The different structural formula

I may be dumb

But I'm not stupid enough to forget you

Well, bromine is best

In the alkenes now

Before it might have been coloured

But now it's colourless

Well, bromine is best

In the alkenes now

Before it might have been coloured

But now it's colourless

We're fucked up...

You're fucked up...

Paranoid Substitutions (parodying Basket Case)

Do you have the time

To work out my reaction

With reactants and catalysts

All at once

I am one of those

Nucleophilic substitutions

Start with a halogenoalkane

No doubt about it

Sometimes I form a carbocation

Sometimes my molecule is in a transition state

It’s the slow step that counts

Am I just tetrahedral?

I’m trigonal planar

I broke heterolytically, so slow

Now the nucleophile attacks

The positive Carbon

I have a one step

Reaction now 2nd order

And everything’s happening at once

Bonds forming and breaking

Rate depending on both

Reactants, hold on.

Know Your NMR (parodying Know Your Enemy, duh)

Do you know the NMR?

Do you know your NMR?

Well, gotta know the NMR

Do you know the NMR?

Do you know your NMR?

Well, gotta know the NMR

Do you know the NMR?

Do you know your NMR?

Well, gotta know the NMR

Nuclei have an energy

Against the NMR

Magnetism for the energy

Bringing on the frequency

In the magnetic field

Absorb the energy to flip

Relaxing the energy

The state lowers

Emitting radiation to be detected

TMS in the NMR

Against your sample

Tetramethlysilane

Do you know the NMR?

Do you know your NMR?

Well, gotta know the NMR

Do you know the NMR?

Do you know your NMR?

Well, gotta know the NMR

The same chemical environments

For the hydrogens in TMS

Don't be confused by the magnets

In the electrons

Hydrogen has energy

From chemical shifts

Ratios in the molecule

TMS in the NMR

So gimme gimme radiation

Do you know the NMR?

Do you know your NMR?

Well, gotta know the NMR

Do you know the NMR?

Do you know your NMR?

Well, gotta know the NMR

Do you know the NMR?

Do you know your NMR?

Well, gotta know the NMR

Work out the groups

The number of hydrogens

Figuring out the formula of the compound

TMS in the NMR

Against your energy

Nuclear Magnetic Resonance

Yay!

(Incidentally, I'm also writing a "short" story, but I won't post it until it's finished.)

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