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Now You're Just Somebody That I Used to Yknow

Posted by GreenRanger , 11 December 2012 · 300 views

Admit it, you just sung that title like the song.  You may not have wanted to, but somewhere in your head you did, and you know it.
 
Oddly enough, I've been using that now-famous phrase a lot.  While I dislike the song because there's really nothing interesting going on with it and I'm pretty sure the xylophone player gets the short end of the credits stick, and also I hate the name "Gotye" (pronounced in my world as "Goatyee"), I find that that line is interestingly profound.  Actually, I more or less just wonder if I would have thought of that phrase on my own without the song. See, it's very relevant to my life.  In this day and age, we have facebook friends, but once again...how many of them are actually your friends?  In my case, I could get rid of most people from my high school on the basis that they're not even my friends.
 
It's a bit of a touchy subject really.  If you're out of high school, go grab your yearbook and look at everyone who wrote little blurbs.  Now, count the instances of "we've GOT to hang out" or "we've GOT to keep in touch" or "don't ever change."  Yeah.  For me, that's fun because none of that ever happened.  Like normally, you can count on them following through in the months of summer, but yeah no, not in my life.  If you didn't think I was a pretty lonely kid in the summer of '10 and the surrounding time area, let me give you this tidbit: I wasn't invited to ANY graduation parties for people from my high school.  I was invited to one...for a person that went to my middle school.  And yeah no, all of those people who decided that their need for conversation or interaction with me was essentially enough to put it in writing...yeah...haven't heard from them.  And furthermore...
 
Yeah, see?  Touchy subject.  You get the picture.
 
I can't really consider a whole lot of people my friends anymore.  Heck, based on how much I've seemingly changed in the past three years, I'd say I barely know them anymore.  Hence, should anyone ask me about someone from high school, I'd probably chime in with "Oh, I used to know them."  Why?  Well, that's quite simply the truth.  College isn't some thing that you just do.  It changes you, and you're changing during it (brain development doesn't stop till the mid 20s, yknow).  This is why it'd be awkward to just strike up a conversation with someone, especially if there are huge differences in your living style.  Like maybe it's hard to imagine what it'd be like for a commuter to talk to their old friend who lives at college in another state after a long while.  Kinda weird really. 
 
Expanding the idea though, people you fall out of touch with kind of get solidified in that point in time.  They literally are just...somebody that you used to know.  It's one of those things that speaks to the notion that time never stands still and events continue to occur even without you.  You were on these two paths that just happened to converge for a bit, and now they're as far apart as they can be.  Yet, personally, I'm not sad about it.  I mean, I'm a little bitter that no one decided they wanted to keep knowing me...quiter bitter indeed, but...  I think facebook kind of removes that longing for the days and people of old.  Even as they go on and become different people, you can still watch them and monitor that change.  In the old days you wouldn't know what happened to them.  You couldn't just see that they're involved in a completely different world now.  Back then, it was just the two worlds that mattered.  "Catching up" was a thing.  You got to get to know the person all over again, and be surprised by their changes.  Now, watching them, you just feel kind of...hopeless...  It's a melancholy thing actually watching someone's life from outside on the street.
 
Gah, the things we can do with technology today.  Kind of odd, no?  I mean, think about it...facebook has kind of changed everything.  Every time you spend a minute alone you discover some new way things are different now.  Even scarier, you can start to think about how adults feel when their kids are completely immersed in things that were only fledgling ideas in their youth.  I'm a 90s kid.  And us 90s kids are probably the last ones to have a childhood without the internet and social media.  We're the last ones to deal with non-electronic toys being the mainstream and phones being things that couldn't leave the house.  Yet, kids today already have been born into a world where everyone is connected all the time.  A lot of 90s kids see it as a travesty...but only, I think, because we grew up in a rapidly changing time.  Kids today will have completely different sets of ideas than we do because they're in a very different world...and their world is neither better nor worse than ours...and even if it is, our judgment means nothing to them. 
 
I realized that when I considered that my parents' upbringing is completely foreign to me, and I have no way of comprehending it.   Try doing that and you'll know what it's like to try and think in reverse...yknow from their perspective.
 
Lemme know what you think...kind of a cerebral topic now...kinda escalated quickly, eh?

  • Dr. Queen Schultz, joeysturkeyhead and Cob like this


I read your other blog. You mention a lot that people probably don't read it. It made me feel awkward.

 

Although I must say, you have a blog about why you don't work, and I agree with you 100%. Just putting that out there. 

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Hang in there, buddy :hug: I've been where you are. I'm the one that's never invited to parties, the one no one ever texts or talks to and it's been a long time since my so-called friends left for good. But honestly, it's not your fault, and people who can't appreciate you do not deserve you, and sometimes, it's for the best.

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joeysturkeyhead
Dec 12 2012 04:18 PM
I'm thinking of Emenius Sleepus.
    • GreenRanger likes this
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GreenRanger
Dec 12 2012 04:24 PM

Thanks, Sofouska.  I'm largely at peace with it though.  Like yeah, I'm bitter, but it doesn't eat away at me or anything.  More than anything, it's just interesting to think about now.  Kind of a shame, but I think the same thing you do: their loss.

 

and @cob1994, yeah, I haven't updated that one in a while because this one kind of took over.  But it's true, 90% of my views that weren't Cat C and a few assorted others were marked as having come from Russia...and there weren't even many of them...oh and probably 40 of that 90 percent was me just revisiting the page.  And yeah, I don't like making excuses, but when everyone around you is complaining...it doesn't make for good advertising.

    • Cob likes this
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joeysturkeyhead
Dec 12 2012 04:33 PM
I think both Billie and Kurt said something Along the lines of "it's better to be yourself and not have any friends than having a bunch of friends that doesn't like you for who you really are".

But seriously, best quote ever. That's some pure motivation for me, sure it's sad to not have friends but the sad people are the ones who aren't being themselves.

Even if I tried to be like everyone else, I would fail. I never really understood what people considered normal so... Also no one should be sad because you had friends that left you or in other cases maybe started acting like dicks, because the truth is that those people never really were your friends, if they don't come back to you or apologize.
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GreenRanger
Dec 12 2012 04:34 PM

Yeah, i realized that a little while back myself.  I was actually planning to write an entry concerning something like that...maybe I'll do that tonight. 

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Dr. Queen Schultz
Dec 13 2012 06:27 PM

Hey Eric. I just wanted to say how much I liked that blog post. I can highly relate to it. It's been last week that I checked my facebook again and just saw how many "friends" I have that are only known people from school actually. So I decided to go through all of them actually delete the ones I have nothing to do with anymore. Basically because as you said, they are just people that I "used to know".

 

I've always been the one who only had about 3 or 4 real close friends and anyone else was just people I knew, but nothing more. Which is why I have my very own definition of "friends" too. 

 

Once again: I enjoyed reading that post because it's pretty much my opnion on things too. Well except that I like the song. ^^

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